What’s Beard Reading? (3.11: “Mom City”)
Forgiveness has been a running theme on Ted Lasso.[1] Even before Rebecca comes clean at the end of Season 1 about sabotaging Ted’s plans at Richmond, several minor plot points have touched on the need for restoration in the face of wrongdoing. Minor failings are lovingly corrected with grace, such as when Ted snaps at Nate or Keeley uses Roy to get back at Jamie. These acts of mercy lay the groundwork for the undoing of more grievous wrongs as the story progresses and prime us to expect redemption. Compassion is arguably the central premise of the series. It accounts for Jamie’s return to Richmond in Season 2 (and his continued growth in Season 3), and it’s why we have anticipated a turnaround for Nate despite his betrayal of Ted and the team.
Last week’s episode was the culmination of that arc, as Beard confronts Nate’s treachery and chooses to forgive him anyway. We also witness another instance of forgiveness as Jamie struggles to come to terms with his father’s horrible mistreatment of him through the years. The catalyst that shifts both Beard’s and Jamie’s perspectives is Ted. In word and deed, Ted manifests the generative nature of love and its power to repair heinous wrongs. That’s also a message close to the heart of Victor Hugo’s Les Misérables, the novel Beard references to explain his backstory and make sense of his new posture toward Nate.
In Jamie’s case, we see a reversal of Ted’s earlier shocking decision to bench Jamie, when his arrogance vitiated whatever star power he brought to the team (“Tan Lines”). Now, Jamie’s confidence is shot as the Greyhounds are once again playing Manchester City, a rivalry haunted by the specter of his abusive father. And when Jamie twists his ankle, rather than take him out, Ted plays a man down, asking the trainers to use all their tricks so Jamie can recover. It also affords time for a heart to heart, where Jamie confesses that not knowing where his dad is, not seeing him in the stands, is unnerving him.
His dad, we know, wouldn’t pass up the opportunity to rub Jamie’s failure in his face. Ted offers a different way forward: “You know, Jamie, if hating your Pops ain’t motivating you like it used to, it might be time to try something different. Just forgive him.” Jamie protests: his dad doesn’t deserve forgiveness.[2] Even still, Ted responds, “When you choose to do that, you’re giving that to yourself.” With this statement, Ted’s getting at something crucial about forgiveness. There are always two parties involved in such situations: the wrongdoer and the wronged. A forgiving stance, in other words, can’t fully rectify a wrong, but sometimes it’s all we can do. Even then, in its impartial state, such forgiveness is not nothing.
The state of our heart and attitude towards others matters quite a bit, as Jamie’s history with his father shows. It marks a real turning point for Jamie to forgive his father, whether it means a restored relationship or not. I appreciated the light touch that the writers used in leaving the door open to reconciliation between Jamie and his dad without pretending there are easy fixes. With such an entrenched pattern of abuse on the father’s part, change is hard to come by. His being in rehab is a start, and Jamie’s text is a safe way to open back up communication while maintaining boundaries.
Forgiveness is a thorny subject, mostly because there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to all the vagaries and vicissitudes of relationships, situations, and offenses that require its remedy.[3] What’s called for in one setting would be anathema in another, as it could set a victim up for yet more harm. Perhaps Jamie’s strong enough now that his father’s slights won’t touch him, but perhaps not. Best at this point to take things slow. Complete reconciliation is what forgiveness aims at, of course, but there are times that a partial fix is the best you can get.
That doesn’t seem to be the case for Nate. Yes, his treatment of Ted and the team was atrocious, but there’s plenty of evidence that he isn’t as far gone as one like James Tartt (and certainly not as far as Rupert). There’s something right about his return to Richmond. Nate himself realizes this, and his 60-page apology letter to Ted signifies an internal transformation. He recognizes his failing and has taken ownership for it. Beard’s offer of forgiveness and a job is the final piece of the puzzle.
What’s most beautiful about this scene is that we learn Beard himself was the beneficiary of such love and grace and is paying it forward. Beard’s background has been shrouded in mystery, and what we learn here fits with our sense of the coach as worldly wise and formed by adversity. The extent and longevity of Ted’s generosity and optimism comes into full view as Beard likens him to the priest of Hugo’s story who has long been held up as an archetype of forgiveness and mercy. The priest, Bishop Myriel, extends hospitality to ex-convict Jean Valjean who has been turned away by innkeeper after innkeeper. Valjean has just been released from prison, having served nearly two decades for stealing a loaf of bread.
Ted, too, provides a second chance for Beard, giving him a place to crash after he gets out of prison himself. Like Valjean, Beard takes advantage of his benefactor’s kindness. He steals Ted’s car and, since he’s out on parole, is at risk of going back to prison. Ted steps in, Bishop Myriel like, and tells the police that he has given Beard the car. In that way, Ted rescues him, not just from jail but from himself. This act of mercy is a lifeline, helping Beard find his way back to his best self. It is this transformative work of love that Ted is pointing to when he asks Beard to recognize in Nate the possibility for reclamation.
Although at this point the audience doesn’t yet know of Beard’s past, obviously the coach does. And his conscience can’t ignore Ted’s pleas to see in Nate what Beard himself once was: “You know, I don’t know about you, Coach. But I hope that either all of us or none of us are judged by the actions of our weakest moments, but rather by the strength we show when and if we’re ever given a second chance.” Bishop Myrial concurs, making clear that the real gift Valjean has been given is an opportunity to do differently: “Jean Valjean, my brother, you no longer belong to what is evil but to what is good. I have bought your soul to save it from black thoughts and the spirit of perdition, and I give it to God.” Forgiveness, on this understanding, is not a stopping point, an end in itself, but instead is an instrument of yet more restoration and reconciliation.[4] Rebecca learns this lesson, as she looks Rupert full in the face and sees in him the destructive end of her single-minded pursuit of revenge (“All Apologies”). She finally realizes that she, too, is a victim of her own scheme, which will cost her nothing less than her conscience and soul.
Ted Lasso entered our lives at a contentious cultural moment. 2020 was rather bleak, defined by a global pandemic, social unrest, and hyper-partisan hostilities. The show was a breath of fresh air amid the contentious debates that raged, calling us to see the other as human much like ourselves. Perhaps the series borders on the Pollyannaish at times, but the note of forgiveness it sounds is one we desperately need to hear and heed. Ted Lasso has touched on themes of faith (belief), hope (that kills you), and love (forgiveness). As we’re nearing the finale, I think it’s more than fair to say that the greatest of these is love.
[1] My contribution to the forthcoming Wiley-Blackwell volume, Ted Lasso and Philosophy, centers on forgiveness, specifically asking if Rupert is beyond the reach of forgiveness.
[2] By definition, of course, none of us deserves forgiveness.
[3] See my discussion of forgiveness in this two-part series, “Can Forgiveness Make Sense?”
[4] Forgiveness is sometimes confused with enablement, which is a far cry from this lifegiving process. Lewis B. Smedes’ Forgive and Forget is a wonderful guide that unpacks many of the knotty questions and issues of forgiveness.
Other Installments of “What’s Beard Reading?” (for Season 3):
Episode 1, “Smells Like Mean Spirit”
Episode 2, “(I Don’t Want to Go to) Chelsea”
Episode 7, “The Strings That Bind Us”
Episode 8, “We’ll Never Have Paris”
Episode 9, “La Locker Room Aux Folles”
